To the Parent Thinking About Home Educating, A Letter From Me

Dear Parent,

I see you. You may be sitting there, probably late at night when the house is quiet, googling things like "is home education right for my child" or "how do I even start" or maybe just "can I actually do this?"

I was you. Not that long ago. And I want to write you this letter because I wish someone had written it to me.

You Don't Have to Be a Teacher

This is the first thing I want you to know. I am not a teacher. I have no qualifications in education whatsoever. What I am is a mum who loves her children and wants the best for them. That is enough. That has always been enough.

You know your child better than any teacher ever could. You know what makes them tick, what makes them shut down, what lights them up and what breaks their heart. That knowledge is more powerful than any teaching degree.

It Doesn't Have to Cost a Fortune

Please don't let money put you off. We home educate on a tight budget and some of our best days have cost us absolutely nothing. Boot sales, charity shops, Vinted, free resources on Pinterest and Google, ChatGPT for tailored workbook front covers, Twinkl for worksheets, baking bread with a few store cupboard ingredients, science experiments in the kitchen, gardening, park visits, photography walks with a phone camera. The world is your classroom and most of it is free.

There Is No Perfect Way to Do This

Every home ed family looks completely different and that is one of the most beautiful things about it. Some families follow a strict timetable. Some unschool entirely. Some do a little of everything. We start at 10:30am because mornings are hard for us. Some weeks we do five days, some weeks three. We take full breaks during school holidays because my eldest goes to school and we want to be together as a family.

None of that is wrong. All of it is right, because it works for us. You will find what works for you too.

A Word on the Home Ed Police

Ah yes. You will meet them. They live in Facebook groups and comment sections and they have Very Strong Opinions about how you should be doing this. 😄

You'll get the ones who tell you it's called home education not home schooling, as if the word you use determines the quality of your child's education. Scroll past. You'll get the ones who tell you never to let the LA in, never to respond, never to engage. And you'll get the ones who say the complete opposite.

Here's the truth, what you do with your Local Authority is entirely your choice. It's your child. Your family. Your decision. If you're comfortable with a home visit, great. If you'd rather email everything in writing and keep a paper trail, brilliant. If you prefer a phone call, or a meet in a local coffee shop, or no contact at all beyond what is legally required, all of that is valid. Do what feels right for you and don't let anyone make you feel like you're doing it wrong.

The home ed police do not live in your house. You do.

The Hard Days Are Real,  But So Are the Good Ones

I won't pretend it's always easy. I manage chronic pain and mental health conditions every single day and there are days when home educating feels impossibly hard. Days when I'm lying on the sofa and the children are working independently nearby. Days when I feel like I'm failing everyone.

But then there are the other days. The days when something clicks and you watch your child's face light up with understanding. The days when your daughter finds her confidence or your son creates something that takes your breath away. The days when you think, I am so glad we did this.

Those days make every hard one worth it.

You Are Allowed to Rest

Take the school holidays off. Have pyjama days. Let them game, bake, watch movies, play in the garden. Rest is not laziness, it is essential. A rested child is a child ready to learn. A rested parent is a parent who can show up. Give yourself and your children that grace.

The Socialisation Question

Someone will ask you about socialisation. Probably within the first five minutes of telling anyone you home educate. Just smile. Home educated children socialise, through home ed groups, sports, clubs, days out, family, visiting the park, friends and just living life. My children are proof of that.

You Are Not Alone

The home ed community is full of parents just like you, figuring it out as they go, doing their best, loving their children fiercely. You don't have to have all the answers before you start. Nobody does. You just have to start.

And if you're struggling with the decision, with the journey, with your own health or mental health on top of everything else, please know that you are not alone in that either. There are parents out here doing this through chronic pain, through anxiety, through the hard and heavy days. And we are still here. Still showing up. Still choosing our children every single day.

So Can You Do This?

Yes. You can.

Not perfectly. Not without hard days. Not without moments of doubt. But yes, you absolutely can.

Your child doesn't need a perfect teacher. They need you. And you are already enough.

With love,

Sarah, Home Ed Mum Diary 💚